Being Sara

I had my 20 week appointment last week and told my doctor that I have decided to c-section.  We picked a date - yay!  December 30th is baby #2’s birthday.  It’s funny, when I tell people this is the day I’m having my baby, they all say to me - “oh, maybe you’ll have a Christmas baby”.  Then I launch into the explanation about how my first baby was exactly on time, and how my “official due date” isn’t until January 5th, so unless something goes horribly wrong, I’m not expecting any more children until December 30th - period.  Honestly, I would rather have more time in between holidays before the baby’s birthday, but there is only so much I can do about that.  

I am quite happy to have a date - I’ve officially arranged the dates for my maternity leave, and made arrangements for family to watch Xander during and just after the birth.  With Xander, I didn’t know the gender or when the baby would be coming and with this one I know as much information as I possibly can prior to the birth.  It’s a very different experience - a lot less guessing, but for this type-a personality mom, it’s quite nice to be able to plan things in advance

Xander playing with playdough

I think once kids start talking every parent has stories about the cute or silly or sometimes shocking things their kids say.  I can remember laughing until I had tears rolling down my face with some of the things that my nieces and nephew came out with when they were toddlers.  Of course, I would be hard pressed to reacall any of those stories these days.  I suspect that some people find the cute stories about their friends or co-workers kids to be tedious.  On the other hand, that’s pretty much all this blog is, so I’m assuming anyone coming here doesn’t mind hearing about my kid’s cute or funny stories.

A few weeks ago Zach, Xander and I went to visit some friends in the next town over.  As we got in the car, I asked Zach if we should bring some extra juice for Xander.  We were going for dinner and to visit so it would be several hours before we returned.  Zach thought that there would be plenty of juice at the house.  But, Xander would be the only child there, and I worried that the juice available might be cranberry or something else that might not suit Xander’s palate.  Zach responded that Xander wasn’t even 2 - he liked pretty much everything we’ve presented to him so far - he doesn’t have a palate.

Then a little voice piped up from the back seat, “I have a palate!”  Zach and I looked at each other, speechless for a moment before we burst into laughter.  We stand corrected, apparently our son does have a palate…

20 week fetus

I am a type A personality.  I like structure and orginization.  I make lists, and I follow up on questions.  I rarely forget the details.  That is, until now…  My hormones are driving me nuts now!  I can’t remember even the simplest tasks.  Sometimes I’ll have a conversation with someone, and completely forget about it by the next day - it’s like de ja vu to them, but it’s an entirely new conversation to me.  Others at work have noticed too.  I’m more forgetful and scattered these day.  I’ve started making myself lists at work - lists of things I need to at work, lists of things I need to do at home and lists of things I need to talk about with Zach.  Of course, I keep forgetting my home lists at work, so that doesn’t always work out in my favor…  So far, this has been the most irritating pregnancy side effect.  The nausea was the most miserable, but at least it didn’t effect my professional relationships, and I was still able to remember everything that I needed to get done.  Now I just look like a ditz with a round belly.  I don’t know if this symptom will eventually go away like the others, or if I’m doomed to another four plus months of being the pregnant idiot…

Zach and I agreed to hold off on name negotiations until after we learned the sex of the baby.  Now that we know, we’ve started talking.  With Xander, I started looking at names by week 12.  Zach rejected everything I suggested until sometime around my 6th month, I gave up.  I think about my 8th month, he finally suggested Alexander with a nickname of Xander and that was something we both liked.  The same pattern seems to be playing itself out again.  I’ve scoured countless baby name websites and created a list of potential names.  Zach has shot down all the names I’ve suggested, and we’ve begun our name negotiation dance all over again.  I’m not sure how quickly I’ll give up this time, but as the planner in the family, I like to get these sorts of things figured out sooner rather than later.  I don’t want to be going into the hospital still debating names.

Of course, Zach is of the opinion that we should keep the name quiet until after the baby is born.  He doesn’t like the comments and faces people make when you tell them the name you picked prior to it being on a birth certificate.  People think they can still have some influence over the name before the baby is born, and some tend to spout horror stories of some person they knew with the same name, etc.  Or, they say, “you’re really going to name him that?”  I don’t disagree with the philosophy.  Though, other’s opinions of my kid’s names doesn’t bother me all that much.  If Zach prefers to keep this little detail quiet, that’s fine - I can keep the secret for a few months, and at the rate we’re going, I’ll only have to keep quiet for a few weeks

Lately Xander has turned into a very fresh little toddler.  One of his favorite sentences is “I need it” or “I need it now”.  Not to mention the directives “Sit Mom”, “Eat Dad”, “Mom, drink”, etc.  My least favorite is “Stop Mom” and he covers my mouth with his hand when he wants me to stop talking.  Unfortunately, this usually catches me off guard, so I’m rendered speechless for a few seconds, which of course means he’s achieved his goal.

I keep explaining how these are not nice, and hurt people’s feelings, make sad faces, etc.  But it doesn’t seem to change the behavior.  I don’t think Xander is doing these things to intentionally be rude.  Usually if he tells us to eat, it’s because he’s eating, and he wants to be doing what we’re doing.  When he tells us to sit, it’s because he wants us to sit on the floor and play with him.  The “Stop Dad (or Mom)” one is the most rude, and we’re working on stopping that behavior before it gets out of hand, but I’m just surprised at how quickly he learned these phrases and their effects.

That being said, he is still a very sweet little kid - always making sure to share with us, whether it’s potato chips or a soggy piece of grilled cheese from his plate.  He’s not generally naughty, and usually listens when we ask him not to do things (though he definitely does test his boundaries on a regular basis).  Ocassionally he’ll use an unprompted “please” or “thank you” and he’ll always say it when prompted.  Just the other day he gave Zach an unprompted hug and “I love you” which I think might have been the sweetest thing in the world ;-)  I’m just not sure how to teach this little guy about manners…  Anyone have any suggestions?